(SETTING INTENTIONS: MOM STYLE)
Let’s talk intentions.
If you ask Drew my word of the year, he will spit out intentional in a heartbeat.
INTENTION: (NOUN): A DETERMINATION TO ACT IN A CERTAIN WAY. SIGNIFICANCE. PURPOSE WITH RESPECT.
Everyone needs to be intentional. Speak with intention. Act with intention. But, I think we often forget how to be intentional with our time. We get lazy or caught up, and before we know it, the day has passed yet again. Even worse feeling is when we have the best of intentions, yet somehow fall short. (Spot-on, me.) Most everyone can do a better job with being intentional in everyday life, but I specifically want to talk to the mamas.
LET’S TALK “ME TIME.”
Foreign concept, right?
Being intentional is more important than ever. Most importantly, be intentional with your precious time. Absolutely, be intentional with your time with your little love. But, make sure you’re also intentional with your time.
Well Jacqui, I have no me time. And if you even want to call the 30 minutes I get, “me time,” I want to sit on the couch and zone out and close my eyes for two seconds if I’m lucky.
My response would be, that’s perfect! Just have the mindset you’re intentionally choosing to attempt to relax and nap when baby is napping, instead of, “Oh no, the day passed me by again! I got nothing done!” and therefore go down a downward spiral of discouragement. So many hate hearing, sleep when baby sleeps. I don’t know why, because I’m like hell yes I’m going to sleep when baby sleeps! New moms need to recharge as much as a baby’s body needs to recharge (especially if you’re nursing).
*While we’re at it, people need to use “new mom” with an asterisk. A new mom can be defined as long as a new mom feels. The second you get used to a schedule with your baby, they hit a huge mental milestone and it’s time to alter their schedule again. Which means, you are constantly learning something new. My point is, you’re a new mom as long as you want to be. 1 year? Sure. Whatever you feel comfortable with and don’t be shy of that title. People need to understand that and be extra understanding, supportive, loving, and kind during your huge learning curve. I have very strong feelings on how you should be treated as a new mom, but that’s beside the point for now.
I am so far from good with this so-called “me time,” but I am really good about my intentions. I don’t get mad at myself for sleeping or napping, thinking of the million other things I should be doing, because I intentionally chose to take a nap. And if you aren’t dozing off while baby is asleep, you’re doing their laundry, cleaning their nursery, sterilizing bottles & binkys, watching them sleep because you somehow miss them already even when you’re in the same room with them, but their eyes are closed – you name it, you’re doing it for them.
MY GOAL WITH CHATTING WITH YOU TODAY IS TWOFOLD.
1. Never beat yourself up over “not getting enough done in the day.” Are you kidding me?? You are literally keeping a human alive let alone making sure he/she grows mentally and physically! Sorry, but I call that a huge win.
2. Realize that me time doesn’t mean you have to leave the house and do everything you can imagine. You can have me time at home, in as little as 4 minutes. It’s all about perspective, people.
IF YOU ARE READY TO SLOWLY START INTEGRATING ME TIME INTO YOUR SCHEDULE WHEN BABY NAPS, HERE ARE SOME IDEAS.
You don’t need to leave the house and they only take a minute (or five) if you want them to.
- Put on a face mask or special scrub. Takes no time and after being a mom who is just learning to get some me time in, you’ll feel so rejuvenated and like you just left the spa. I literally do this in my bathroom when Bridget is in the bassinet in my bedroom. I don’t care how quiet I have to be or if I feel like I’m sharing my space. You would think I left for hours after how I feel after those 4 minutes.
- Take a bath with salts, bombs, oils, bubbles. Light a candle & you do you girl.
- Online shop. Even if I’m shopping for Bridget, it truly makes me happy. But shop for you, do whatever. Treat yo self.
- Shower & actually WASH & DRY your hair. Whoh, what a concept. Pretty foreign and actually doable. No spit up in your hair feels awesome.
- While you’re at it, put on makeup. Even if you’re not leaving the house. You’ll feel pretty.
- Turn on HGTV, Food Network, an old episode of Friends, or your fave movie and actually watch it instead of it just being on in the background.
- Cook up a fun recipe you’ve been wanting to try. (If you enjoy cooking/baking)! I love to be in the kitchen and I simply don’t have time anymore to cook a real meal, ever. And if I do have time, I’m too exhausted by the time I have the opportunity to do so. So, it’s a treat when I do.
- Sit outside, on your patio, backyard, wherever you still have range of baby with your monitor while feeling sunshine or fresh air. Even if you literally stand for 60 seconds with the door wide open, an inch outside the house.
- Facetime, call, or voice memo with your best girlfriend.
- Read a book, blog post, listen to a podcast.
- Do an at home workout.
Please know I am so, so far from good with me time. Because in addition to me not having the time (like most moms out there), I’m that mom that doesn’t want to leave my girl’s side for a moment because of how infatuated I am. So I’m not here telling you I’ve got this down. I’m here telling you I am very intentional (or at least try to be). And now I am trying to incorporate being intentional with me time while Bridget naps. I hope these baby steps (pun intended) encourage you to slowly do a better job at treating yourself. Because you deserve it. Or atleast look at things from a different perspective of gentleness with yourself.
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